Thursday, August 25, 2005

La Nuit des Serpents

Golden Buffalo Hotel - Hanoi, Vietnam
Special Guest Blogger - Jarah E.

[Note: Numerous accent marks are missing - too lazy to figure out how to type them.]

C'est le trentieme anniversaire de Jarah E. Celebrer, cette nuit nous avons mange et bu seulement les serpents. Il y'a une village pas loin de Hanoi ou on peut manger la coeur d'un serpent pendant il est encore battant. Nous sommes parti notre hotel sur trois motocyclettes. Jason a fait un video de la voyage (venant tout de suite a un website pres de vous). Il va sans disant que nous avons grand peur.

Le restaurant on a rate, mais comme meme il y avait le serpent. Quand nous sommes reste a discuter ce problem la dame est arrive avec une cobra tres formidable. Quand on a le vu, c'etait l'amour a tout de suite. On est arrive au table, et la dame est suivu avec le beau serpent. Comme j'adore ce reptile chaud. Elle a porter une bouteille de formaldahide (le vin Indoceinois). Elle a egorge notre beau ami et verse son sang chaud dans la bouteille. Apres, bien cele, elle a verse la bile dans une deuxieme bouteille.

Elle a libere le truc plus beau, le coeur frappant dans une sant grele, ou il a continue bien a frapper tres regularement. Encore, il y a un petit video. Jarah l'a avale, et il a continue bien a frapper dans sa bouche, comme une petite gamine. Il n'a pas su si il faut le macher ou l'engouillir complet. Finalement, apres une guerre de bouche, ca n'a plus frappe. Et on restait tranquille.

Apres on avait deux bouteille, une du sang et une de la bile. Tous les hommes ont bu le sang (avec fermaldahide, on dit vin-du-riz) et les vrais hommes ont bu aussi la bile. C'est dommage que Jasone n'est pas vrai, mais qu'est-ce qu'on peut espoir pour un demi-mexicain? Apres des boissons on a mange beaucoup de pieces des serpents, comme le potage de "belly-shavings" et les intestines dans les feuilles (ou peut-etre pas les feuilles? et peut-etre pas les intestines? Qui peut dire? C'est pas grave.) Le peau croquant etait delicieux. Si je trouve le peau croquant dans les adventures futures des motocyclettes je vais le manger.

En fin c'est arrive le "vin" du serpent. On l'a porte chez les australiens, le boire sans la possibilite des conversations intelligents (mais les austaliens peuvent communiquer avecs les ... non peut etre ce n'est pas possible). Alors, nous avons acheve le but.

fin

16 Comments:

Blogger juancnuno said...

Sacre bleu! Je ne parle pas le francais!

8/26/2005 6:03 AM gmt

 
Anonymous andrew said...

quel bel effort! je suis très impressionné mon ami pour la prochaine fois voici les codes ASCII pour les accents courants:
é [ALT+130]
è [ALT+138]
å [ALT+134]

just one question: did you do this in french because they will eat absolutely anything and that they are the only ones who would not faint at the description of your gastronomic eloquence...?

8/26/2005 7:58 AM gmt

 
Anonymous andrew said...

so you don't do UTF-8 then...

8/26/2005 8:00 AM gmt

 
Anonymous dre said...

WTF? ;-)
can anybody please translate this for us poor non-frogs? ;-P

8/26/2005 8:28 AM gmt

 
Anonymous Eva said...

What dre said, fools.

8/26/2005 1:39 PM gmt

 
Blogger juancnuno said...

I linked to the Babel Fish translation in my first comment.

8/26/2005 3:36 PM gmt

 
Anonymous dre said...

good point, juan. didn't realize that. still, a proper translation would be nice...

8/26/2005 4:35 PM gmt

 
Blogger juancnuno said...

Dre makes a good point. I write these gems and link to pure gold and sometimes the links go over peoples' heads because the link colors blend in with everything else. Maybe tweak the colors a bit?

I know Jason disagrees, but I'm a big advocate of underlining hyperlinks. That would help a lot.

But then, Jason disagrees with everything I say.

8/26/2005 5:51 PM gmt

 
Anonymous al said...

Google trans mostly crap, bar the first line:

"It is the trentieme anniversary of Jarah E. Celebrer, this night we have eats and drunk only the snakes"

The day "this night we have eats and drunk only the snakes" doesn't appear in the first paragraph of an OC entry, is the day I stop reading this crappy blog!

8/27/2005 5:26 AM gmt

 
Blogger Mik3 said...

Juan - will see about changing link colors. Have been meaning to make some template changes to fix a couple of other issues anyway.

Eva/Dre - An English version (though not a direct translation) is forthcoming.

Andrew - We figured "when in Indochine do like the colonial masters do". Or did, rather.

Andrew again - Blogger kicks out pages in UTF-8. Are you having issues with accents? It may be that your browser is locked to latin-1.

Still Andrew - Eating a Cessna is both unhealthy and morally wrong. We should be eating Migs.

8/27/2005 5:34 AM gmt

 
Anonymous derek said...

No translations, only French from now on...

8/30/2005 6:33 AM gmt

 
Anonymous Jen said...

Not that Derek could read a word of it :-)

But I rather endjoyed the post.

I like the blue links...underlining random words interrupts the flow of a sentence.

8/30/2005 6:54 AM gmt

 
Blogger juancnuno said...

Choice is good. Let people have the option of underlining their links or not. Whatever CSS hacks you guys are using ignore my "Underline links," true setting. If people don't want underlines, they can set that to false.

I've heard that people who don't underline their links don't like ice cream and kick baby kittens...

8/30/2005 8:37 PM gmt

 
Blogger jason said...

Never!

Link underlining is a tool of the weak. I won't contribute to the regression of web page standards. Next, you'll be asking me to make all of the hyperlinks blink.

9/03/2005 5:19 AM gmt

 
Anonymous Theodore said...

Bonne anniversaire, Jarah!!

Je te promets, je ne dirai pas à ta copine ta petite aventure avec le serpent... elle serait jalouse!

9/06/2005 8:24 AM gmt

 
Anonymous le serpent qui voudrait que Jarah serait retourne son coeur said...

An approximate tranlsation of La nuit de serpents...not exact, but an estimation for some who might like to know roughly what was said...

The Night of the Serpents or the Serpent’s Night

It’s the thirtieth anniversary of Jarah E. Celbrer, the night that we ate and drank serpents. There in a small village, not far from Hanoi, one can eat a snake’s heart while it is still beating. We are leaving our hotel on three motorcycles. Jason has made a video of the trip (coming to a website near you). It goes without saying that we are quite afraid.

The restaurant had spoils, but unlike many it had serpent. When we had stopped to discuss the problem, the waitress arrived with a very large cobra. When we saw it, it was love at first sight. It arrived at our table, and then the waitress followed with a beautiful serpent. I adore this HOT reptile. She brought a bottle of formaldehyde (the wine of Indonesia). She sliced our beautiful friend and poured his blood into the bottle and then , she poured the bile into the second bottle.

She freed the most beautiful part, the beating heart in a holy grail, where it continued to beat strongly and formidably. Again, there is another short video. Jarah swallowed it, and it continued to beat in his mouth, like a young girl. He didn’t know if it was necessary to chew it or eat it whole. Finally, after a war in the mouth, it no longer beat and it went still.

After we had had the two bottles, one of blood and one of bile, all the men drank the blood (with formaldehyde, or called rice wine) and the true men also drank the bile. It is too bad that Jason is not a true one, but what can he hope because he is half Mexican? After the fish, we ate lots of pieces of serpents, like the stew of belly shavings and the intestines in the paper (in what papers? Could it be the intestines, what can I say? It’s not too bad). The skin was delicious. If I can find the skin in future motorcycle adventures I will eat it.

And last, but not least, arrived the snake “wine.” We drank it like Australians, to drink without the possibility of intelligent conversation (but Australians can communicate with them… but it was not to be). At last, we achieved the drink.

End.

10/14/2005 8:45 PM gmt

 

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